My Girlfriends Are Pirate Elves! 1 Read online

  Jon tried to stop his grin and failed. “Mario, no more discounts. You’re running a business here.”

  Mario kept his welcoming smile, “True, but it is my business and I can give discounts to who I please.”

  “Jon, don’t be so difficult. Mario here wishes to give a discount and it would be an insult if we didn’t accept.

  “Mario, we do have a need that perhaps you can help us with. I have a ship in the docks that requires supplies.”

  The store owner nodded. “I completely understand. Gather your supplies and put them on that counter there. I will have my people bring it to your ship and leave it on the deck in special containers. I’ll contact our dear Jon here with a text when the delivery is complete.”

  Lilly touched Mario’s arm, “Thank you. This kindness will not be forgotten.”

  The older man’s eyes lit up. “Please, shop and do not hesitate to ask me any questions.”

  “We will,” Lilly smiled before turning to the aisles and walking with curious eyes.

  Mario leaned in close to Jon, “She’s a beauty and a keeper. Do not let this one go or I will swoop in and make her my fourth wife.”

  Jon gave the store owner an amused sideways glance, “Wife number four?”

  Mario nodded. “My previous three wives thought I was too loving. Divorces are messy, but they never said that I didn’t love them.”

  Jon grinned before an idea struck him. “Mario, do you have gifts?”

  The owner nodded. “We just installed an aisle for gifts of all kinds. The Boardwalk Park has been very popular and many of the shops are joining in. I would recommend looking it over.”

  Jon nodded. “What about your top shelf rum?”

  Mario looked to Jon with a devious wink. “Back right corner of the store. If it’s for you and the beautiful lady, it’s on the house.”

  ***

  “I can help carry those,” Lilly said.

  Jon walked up the hill with several heavy bags, sweat appearing along his brow.

  “I got it,” the young man stated simply.

  Lilly eyed him up and down. “We’re almost there. I can help the rest of the way?”

  “A man’s got to do what a man’s got to do. I won’t let gravity defeat me!” Jon strained.

  Lilly covered her mouth as Jon grunted. His arms were packed with bags, his gaze just over the edge of his purchases. His muscles straining, Jon wondering if he should have brought the car down the hill.

  No! Mind over body! You hear me body! You will do as I say!

  The couple climbed the last part of the hill and stepped towards Jon’s front door. The door opened, Syndra eyeing Jon as he nearly rushed through. Stepping aside, she made no move to help as he charged to the kitchen table and gently slammed the bags onto the surface, huffing and puffing.

  “Thanks… for… helping,” Jon said with a sarcastic edge.

  “You’re a man, you’re supposed to do the heavy lifting,” Syndra shrugged before she stepped closer to him, kissed his cheek and stepped back.

  Jon smiled as Lilly closed the front door. Zelda and Cora were standing and moving closer to see what the pair brought. The house was warm and welcoming as the elves moved to the edge of the table and Lilly moved to Jon’s side.

  “Okay, supplies will be delivered to the ship and what we have here is for a hearty dinner later,” Jon said as he moved to a bag and began to rummage through it.

  “First thing tomorrow, we will stow the supplies and our effects,” Lilly instructed.

  Jon’s hands touched something and he smiled. Lifting his head, he looked at Zelda, Syndra, and Cora in turn. Eyes filled with excitement, he started talking with a warm eagerness.

  “I know it’s only been a few days, but before we embark on our sea adventure, I thought I would get something for everyone.”

  Syndra gave Jon a suspicious look, Zelda’s face shifted into a wide, sharp smile and Cora simply blinked.

  Jon dug out a box and a book. The box was about the size of his chest as he held it in one hand and placed the book on top of it. He stepped toward the shadow elf as she looked down at the box. Her crimson eyes turned into heart shapes as she saw what he was bringing closer.

  Jon grinned. “It’s a small cotton candy maker. It has all the ingredients and the recipe to make your own cotton candy. It also runs on batteries so we can take it with us anywhere.”

  Syndra’s hands trembled as she reached for the box and touched the see-through plastic window, her gaze firmly on the small machine.

  Jon lifted a book up and handed it to the sea witch, “It’s titled ‘500 Basic Things, Traditions and Cultures of Urth.’ It’s a simple, handy book for anyone new to our dimension. I thought maybe you should get more time reading about this world and less time talking to the spirits since they just seem to be giving you information about me.”

  The shadow elf took hold of the book and pressed it to her chest. “Thank you, Jon. I will treasure these gifts.”

  Syndra picked up the box and book, turned and made her way to the living room couch. She sat down and a second later, began ripping the box open.

  Jon stepped back to the table and dug into a separate bag. He turned his attention to Cora and smiled.

  “I know you really liked that snake from the Neon Boardwalk Park,” Jon said as he pulled out another giant stuffed purple snake.

  The young man brought it forward, but small hands snatched it from him. Cora wrapped her thin body with the fuzzy snake, holding the head close to her head.

  “Thank you, Jon,” Cora said before she rushed him, kissed his cheek, twirled and walked to the couch to join Syndra.

  Zelda stood, hands clasped before her chin and nearly bouncing.

  Jon reached into a bag and pulled out two necklaces. The young man stepped to the seven-foot-tall sea elf and held up a necklace to her. Zelda’s smile faded as she looked down at a simple necklace with a shark tooth dangling from it. A webbed hand took the necklace and Zelda gazed down on the shark tooth with wide eyes.

  “This is the closest thing I could find for what I was looking for. It’s a shark’s tooth. When I saw it, I immediately thought of you. I wanted you to know how special and important it was when you told me about your life.”

  Jon held up a second necklace and put it around his neck, a shark tooth dangling from it.

  “Your story was so profound, I bought two of these necklaces so they would always remind ourselves of each other. When I look at my necklace, I will think of you. I hope, when you look at your necklace, you will think of me.”

  Zelda shifted the tooth with her finger before turning her gaze to Jon. “You looked at an Urth creature’s tooth, that is similar to creatures from my world and thought this would make an acceptable gift? You have essentially given me something that would be similar to you giving one of your human teeth to another? I don’t know what to say.”

  Jon’s heart sank in his chest, wondering if he completely botched Zelda’s gift.

  Zelda blinked as she stared at the necklace when her entire face lit up. “This is the most heartwarming and beautiful gift I have ever received in my life!”

  Eyes took on heart shapes as she quickly put the necklace to her neck, the shark tooth visible for all to see. Jon barely had a chance to smile in relief when the tall sea elf rushed him, clamped her arms around him in an embrace and lifted him up. Zelda kissed him hard, driving her tongue into his mouth.

  Lilly eyed them with a glow along her cheeks. Syndra and Cora stared from the couch, their hearts lifting in their chests. Jon didn’t fight the embrace, but soon found it hard to breathe. When Zelda let go, Jon fell onto his feet and swayed as he tried to regain his balance.

  Zelda stepped away, joining the rest of the crew as she held up the shark tooth, showing it to the others.

  Jon turned to Lilly, his heart thudding in his chest. The Captain eyed him with a wicked smile. Jon stepped closer until they were barely a foot apart. Jon’s hand slipped into a bag
and he kept it there.

  “And for you…” Jon began before Lilly lifted a hand to stop him from speaking.

  “I have something for you,” the sun elf said in a hushed tone, her hand reaching behind her and pulling something from between the small of her back and her belt.

  Jon kept his cool gaze as Lilly lifted up a sheathed dagger. A finger unbuckled the strap and she drew the blade. She flipped it around her hand before showing it to Jon. In a blink, the dagger sank back into the sheath and Lilly pressed it to his chest.

  “It’s my personal dagger. I’m giving it to you,” the Captain said with a no-nonsense attitude.

  Jon’s left hand clamped onto the sheathed dagger and held it to his chest. “I’ll treasure it.”

  Lilly gave a strong nod. Jon lifted his hand from the bag, gripping a large bottle of expensive rum. He presented it to Lilly and bowed his head to her.

  “The best rum in Southvale,” Jon said with a wicked smirk.

  Lilly grabbed the bottle by the neck and held it up as she marched into the living room.

  “We drink!” the Captain ordered and pulled the cork top with her bare fingers.

  The three elves lifted a fist in cheer. Lilly took a very long swig, her throat moving to the drink before she pulled it away and wiped her mouth with her sleeve. The Captain passed it to Zelda and the sea elf began to guzzle the dark amber liquid.

  “Should we be drinking now?” Jon asked as he saw that it was still early afternoon.

  “Why not?” Lilly shouted with a smile. “Our supplies will be on the ship before morning and we have today to celebrate our coming adventure! Why waste our time worrying about what might happen when we can drink, laugh, and drink some more!”

  Jon put the sheathed dagger on the kitchen table as he approached the four beautiful elves. The bottle was handed to him and he lifted it up, taking a long guzzle. When he pulled it down, he fought with every fiber of his being not to throw up. When he didn’t, he took a deep inhale, rum burning his mouth and throat and stomach.

  “Aye Captain. Ready to follow your orders,” Jon smiled as he handed the bottle back to many happy smiles.

  ***

  Rum flowed, distorting time and reality. The four elves and one man fell into long fits of laughter. The sun slowly crossed the sky as they carried on like hyenas. A drunken haze filled the first floor of the home. Cora’s normally blank face was actually all smiles, hugging her snake close. Zelda growled about being hungry and stalked to the fridge. When she pulled out cold, bloody meat, she took a deep bite and chewed. After a few bites, she complained that it was too cold and needed some heat.

  Syndra had her cotton candy machine up and running while Lilly, Jon, and Cora moved to the kitchen to make a meal. Their bodies moved with stumbling steps as they tried to gather the ingredients together for a large meal. Zelda tried to help, but had a hard time standing before she slumped into a chair and simply watched.

  Jon found his groove, moving with the beautiful elves as they prepared a meal of meat, potatoes, greens, fish, fruit, and salad. There was no set plan other than feeding their hungry bellies. The bottle of rum was passed around, adding to the controlled chaos. Despite inebriated bodies, they managed to pull it together long enough to have a steamy meal on the table before they attacked it like wolves. Jon found himself caught in the moment, not bothering to use utensils because no one was using them. Hands grabbed at food and stuffed into mouths. Lilly was the worst of them, her cheeks covered in food as she eyed Jon and chewed like a hungry beast.

  When the meal was finished, Cora and Lilly cleaned up. Zelda fell asleep in her chair and Syndra made cotton candy, handing the puffs to everyone still awake. It was a pleasant dessert as they devoured each one and looked to the sea witch as she proudly made more.

  Bellies and hearts full from food and drink, the sun sank down behind the horizon. Evening flowed across Southvale with a nightly chill. Cora and Syndra sat on the couch, watching the news. Jon and Lilly helped Zelda to the far end of the couch where they laid her down. Once she was safely down, Syndra pulled the tall sea elf’s legs onto her lap as she continued to work the magical cotton candy machine.

  Jon stood, staring at the beautiful elves, his heart thumping with love. When he glanced to the side, he saw Lilly enter his room and leave the door ajar.

  No words were uttered as Jon turned and followed, weaving across the room to the bedroom door. Stepping in, he saw that a single lamp was on and Lilly was sitting on his bed, drinking more from the bottle of rum. She didn’t make eye contact as she patted the bed.

  Jon gave a drunken grin as he tried to walk to the bed. A misstep caused him to spin and fall, his butt hitting the hard floor and his back against the side of the bed. Lilly let out a long laugh before pressing the nearly finished bottle of rum into his hands and laid down on her side. Her hand drifted to Jon’s shoulder as he took a long guzzle and put the bottle in his lap.

  “I don’t think I’ve… ever drank that much in one day,” Jon said and ended it with a burp.

  “You will get used to it,” Lilly hummed as her fingers walked up his neck and ran through his dark hair.

  “That’s nice,” Jon whispered with a drunken grin.

  “You feel nice,” Lilly said with a slight slur.

  Jon turned his head slightly to look up at the sun elf. Lilly’s eyes held a seductive madness as she couldn’t keep her hands off of him. A finger ran down along his ear and the young man would be lying if it didn’t send a shiver down his spine. He kept his gaze, looking at her with adoring eyes.

  Lilly’s manic gaze dimmed slightly, her fingers moving slower as if a thought struck her hard.

  “What is it?” Jon asked innocently, not wanting her to stop.

  “What was said before haunts my heart,” the sun elf said with a breathy whisper.

  Jon turned around to face the elf’s beautiful face. “It’s okay. I understand how the past can affect heavily on our present and the future.”

  Lilly eyed Jon, her mouth a thin slit.

  Jon crossed his arms on the edge of the bed and looked into Lilly’s emerald eyes. “I have been thinking, how this all happened. I’m not sure if my luck works over long periods of time, but events had to happen in my life, just as in yours, for us to reach this point. Maybe it is fate or luck and we were meant to meet.”

  “A romantic heart beats in your chest,” Lilly said with a wry smirk.

  Jon returned her smile with his own. “It’s more than that. I waited for life to be normal enough for me to live. That normalcy was a lie because it never came. I’m an abnormal man in a strange world. My life was never meant to be mundane. I knew it when we met. I knew it when we kissed.”

  “Jon,” Lilly said with glistening eyes.

  “Lilly, I know it's been a wild ride, but I can tell you, I never want to get off of it. I want to see what happens next. I want us and the crew to explore where fate will take us. I never want to leave your side and I hope you never want to leave mine.”

  Lilly’s glistening eyes hardened. Pressing down on the bed, she pushed herself up into a sitting position and placed her hands in her lap. Her head bowed and her hat cast long shadows over her eyes.

  “Did I say something you didn’t want to hear?”

  Lilly’s lip wrinkled before she spoke, “No, you’re saying all the right things. Every word is true and it hurts me to think that I may scare you away.”

  “I…” Jon began before he was cut off.

  “Don’t say it, not yet. Not until you have heard what I have to say. My crew know my intentions and have aligned with them. I don’t wish to keep any secrets, not if we are truly fated to be together. I must tell you so that you don’t stay out of duty or honor. I want you to stay because you want to.”

  Lilly lifted her head slightly, some light touching her eyes. “My father was a high ranking general and my mother from aristocratic nobility. They came together, falling in love and choosing to leave their lives behind
so they could have a family on a faraway island. They had me and we grew up on that beautiful island for many decades. It was the happiest time in our lives.

  “When news of the Empire growing its armies came to our little island, my father and mother knew what it meant. They had prepared for such a time for years. A ship was hidden in a cave on our island and we set about gathering supplies. My father told me of a far-off island, not on any map. That was where we were to go until it was safe to return. As we prepared, the Emperor’s people found us.”

  Lilly’s eyes glistened again as she continued, “My parents forced me into the tunnel, telling me to get to the ship. I was fully grown, trained in fighting as much as I was taught great knowledge. I was ready to fight, but my parents told me I had to leave, for our family’s sake. We hugged and kissed each other goodbye before they sealed the tunnel and I was alone in the dark.

  “I traversed the tunnel, making my way to the Dark Heart. I pulled on the ropes, collapsing the cave edge to the sea. It was night, my ship slipping away as several Empire ships glowed on the other side of the island.

  “I sailed the seas, trying to find out anything I could about my parents. Bits of information came to me for the right price. My parents were now in servitude to the Emperor. Considering how powerful he is, I knew a simple rescue would never happen, without one or all of us dead.

  “I spent the last eight years, hunting and killing any Captains or crews loyal to the empire. I have made men and women scream for mercy before I cut off their heads or shot them in the face. I’ve dumped many bodies into the sea while their ships burned. Do you know why I did such terrible things? I did them because I knew the only way I could save my parents was if the Empire was broken to dust.”

  Lilly put her hand on Jon’s arm, eyes filled with terrible sorrow. “To follow me means we will destroy an empire. I cannot rest until the Empire is gone and my parents are truly free.”

  Jon’s head tilted forward, his hand over Lilly’s hand. “That’s why you saved Cora. She can help you achieve your quest. She knows the Emperor and can help bring him down.”